22. 解决方案导向的咨询技能

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22 Solution-focused counselling skills As discussed in the previous chapter, skills from Solution-Focused Counselling (as described by Macdonald. 2011) and Narrative Therapy (White, 2007) are particularly useful in enabling a person seeking help to make use of their strengths rather than focus on the negative aspects of their problems. Also, these skills encourage the person to take an optimistic view of the future. They are generally used at the point in the counselling process where the counsellor helps the person to think differently about their problem (see Figures 16.1 and 16.2, pages 135 and 136, which look at restructuring thoughts). Solution-Focused Counselling suggests a number of ways of helping a person to think positively and to gain an optimistic view of the future. These include:

1. looking for exceptions 2 identifying positive responses to negative experiences 3 being positive about change that has occurred 4 being optimistic about the future. Each of these will be discussed in turn. LOOKING FOR EXCEPTIONS A powerful technique to enable a person to get m touch with their strengths is to highlight exceptions by using exception-oriented questions. Except ion-oriented questions aim to promote change by drawing attention to times or situations where an undesirable behaviour did not, or does not, occur. For almost every person who seeks help there will have been past and present problem-free times. However, it is quite possible that many people will not have recognised these problem-free times. A task for the counsellor is therefore to help the person seeking help to identify those times or situations when their current difficulty didn’t occur. Once these have been identified, the counsellor can inquire about them in detail. The counsellor can ask what, when and with whom this exception to the difficulty occurred. For example, a person might say, ‘I’m concerned because I’m drinking every night’, and the counsellor might respond by looking for exceptions by saying, ‘Are there any nights when you haven’t had a drink?’ The person might be able to identify some times when they haven’t been drinking. In this case the counsellor might explore further by saying something like, ‘Tell me about those times.’ The counsellor may then use the person’s views of facts, feelings and ideas associated with these times to help the person to proactively plan how to spend another night without drinking. It needs to be recognised that the person may be unable to identify any recent times when they have not been drinking. In this situation the counsellor will suggest that there might have been a time when they didn’t drink every night. The counsellor will then ask questions to help them remember the skills they used in times when the problem didn’t occur. T’his may include exploring thoughts, behaviours and emotional feelings that they experienced in those times when the problem did not occur. When helping a person deal with a drinking problem, it might also be useful to read Chapter 29 (counselling those troubled by addiction). When looking for exceptions it can be useful to look for times when the person expected the problem to occur but something happened differently or the person acted differently. For example, a person might say 'Last year on my birthday was the only time we didn’t fight’ and the counsellor might respond by saying 'What did you do differently?’ or 'What is your guess about why you didn’t fight?’ The focus is on what worked, helping the person to expand on the details of how it worked and helping them to retrieve how it felt to have things work. Here are some examples of statements or questions a counsellor could use to find out about exceptions when the problem did not or does not occur: Tell me about the times when you don't get angry. When do you and your father get on well without arguing? in what situations do you have control of your impatience? Tell me about times when you have felt happy. Often it is helpful to explore exceptions after externalising the problem, as described in Chapter 21. Suitable questions might then be: Can you recall some occasions when you have prevented the problem from influencing your life? How did you restrict the problem's influence on these occasions?

Highlighting exceptions can empower a person to find solutions

Exception-oriented questions aim to help a person discover that there are times and situations where they behave, or have behaved, differently, and to recognise what it is that enables them to behave differently at those times or in those situations. Gaining understanding in this way enables them to get in touch with their own inner strength so that they can take more control of their behaw our or their environment. By recognising this, they may be able to make choices to bring about positive change. Once the counsellor has discovered that there were times when the problem did not occur, the counsellor can ask questions to explore in detail what was happening at those times. For example, the counsellor might ask questions like: What were you doing at the time when you were able to beat the problem? Can you describe your relationship with your partner at the time when the problem wasn't present? What's your main experience when this problem is not around? What strategies do you know that you have called upon in the past and that you can also use now? When looking tor exceptions, the focus is on helping the person to recognise that at times they are confident and ieel at ease; the aim is to identify situations where they are, or have been, competent and effective, rather than focusing on times when they feel despairing, worthless and overwhelmed by a problem. For example, a young person might say, " The teachers at school say I’m not good at anything.’ In response, the counsellor might say, ‘Your mother told me that you spend a lot of time skateboarding. How did you become good at that?’ They might reply by saying, '1 repeat the same tricks over and over until 1 get expert at doing them. Each time 1 do a trick 1 notice the things that I do wrong so that 1 can correct them the next time.’ By asking Bow did you become good at that?’, the counsellor will have enabled the young person to recognise the strategies they have used for learning particular skills. The counsellor might then be able to help them to transfer these strategies and skills for use in the problem area. IDENTIFYING POSITIVE RESPONSES TO NEGATIVE EXPERIENCES People will often talk about their past experiences as contributing to their current problems. In doing this they often fail to recognise the personal strength that they used in coping with their past experiences. Additionally, it can often be found that negative experiences in the past can be viewed as experiences that, while being negative, have brought about something positive. For example, a person may blame their current situation on the actions of an excessively punitive father. In such a situation the counsellor can express curiosity about how the person was able to cope and survive despite receiving harsh punishment. They might then be able to recognise that they now have some useful inner resources which will enable them to cope with difficult or unpleasant situations. When looking for positive responses to negative experiences the first step is to let the person seeking help know that they have been heard and that their problems, concerns, experiences and points of view are understood. The counsellor can then make it clear that they believe that the person is in control of their own life and consequently suggest that any successful achievement must be a result of the person’s efforts. For example, a person, when talking about her daughter, might say, 'She walks all over me. She’ll only do things if she knows there is a reward,’ and the counsellor might respond by saying, 'It seems to me that you have been able to change her behaviour by using rewards as a useful strategy.’ By saying this, the counsellor clearly attributes positive change to the efforts of the person seeking help, instead of exclusively focusing on the negative part of their statement. It can be useful for counsellors to explore in detail times when a person made a choice or a change that resulted in a positive outcome. They may share with the person what has worked for them in similar situations, or what has worked for other people with the same difficulty. For example, the counsellor might say, 'When I feel like that, I know it’s best for me to go for a long walk by myself/ Alternatively, the counsellor might say, 'Other people have told me that when they experience what you are describing, they find it is helpful to do something active.’ Some particular questions can be used to help a person recognise that they have coped extremely well in adverse situations. These are aimed at encouraging them to view their behaviour in a positive light and to discover unrecognised strengths. Such questions can be extremely useful for those people who are unsure about how well they are coping with life. Examples of this kind of question are: Why aren't things worse? What stopped total disaster from occurring? How did you avoid falling apart? These questions can be followed up by the counsellor positively affirming the person with regard to any action they took to cope. BEING POSITIVE ABOUT CHANGE THAT HAS OCCURRED When things have been bad and things start to change it is easy for a person to fail to recognise that positive change has occurred. Consequently it is important for counsellors to be vigilant in looking for the possibility that positive change has occurred as a consequence of a person’s actions. There are two useful ways of helping someone to feel better as a result of past or recent achievements. One is to ask a question which presupposes positive change, and the other is to use a cheerleading question. An example of a question that presupposes change is: What has been different or better since you saw me last? 1 his question presupposes that some change has occurred since the last meeting and may help the person identify things that have improved, so that they can feel good about the progress they have made or their recent achievements. Quite often, positive change goes unnoticed unless a deliberate question is asked in order to identify change. For example, although they may have had fewer arguments during the week, they might not have recognised this. By using a question that presupposes change, the counsellor can bring the change into focus, making small changes newsworthy so that there is a recognition that improvement has begun. Once improvement has been identified, there is an incentive to make further improvement so that significant change can occur. The use of cheerleading questions has been described by Walter and Beller (1992). Counsellors engage in cheerleading when they show enthusiastic reactions of emotional support when a person tells them that they have used behaviours that are positive and different from behaviours that previously led to undesirable outcomes. Typical cheerleading questions are: How did you do that? How did you manage to make that decision? Well done. That must have been really difficult to do; how did you do it? Additionally, there are some statements that have a similar effect, such as: That sounds good! That's amazing! Cheerleading questions are useful as they help a person to recognise and be encouraged by the knowledge that they have the ability within themselves to behave differently so that positive outcomes occur. BEING OPTIMISTIC ABOUT THE FUTURE Sometimes, in order to help a person to be optimistic about the future, it can be useful for a counsellor to describe the person’s current situation as a stage, or to speak about the problem concerned as a stage; something that they might grow out of, or will get over. For example, a person might say, 4My mother died six months ago and 1 still feel depressed.1 In response, the counsellor might say, 'Losing your mother was a major loss. Before you can move on, you will need to take time to grieve. That’s normal for all people when someone close to them passes away, but in time, for most people, their grief diminishes and they start to feel better.’ This statement is designed to help the person recognise that they are in a stage where it is appropriate to grieve, and that the stage is likely to pass. When helping a person to establish goals for the future it is important to be both realistic and optimistic, it can be useful to suggest that, at some time in the future, the problem will end or things will be better, whenever it seems likely that this will happen. When a person talks about their problem, it can be helpful if the counsellor restates what the person has said in terms of goals to be achieved rather than problems to be removed. For example, the person might say, Tm worried because my husband and 1 fight all the time,’ and the counsellor might respond by saying, ‘You would like it if your husband and you could get along better together. Have you thought about how this might be achieved?' By responding in this way the focus has been removed from the negativity of fighting and instead directed towards a positive goal.

Learning summary Looking for exceptions draws attention to past successes, enabling the person to learn from them. Focusing on successes achieved while experiencing negative experiences puts a person in touch with their inner strength. Drawing attention to positive change is likely to promote more change. Being optimistic about the future may enable a person seeking help to look for solutions. References and further reading